Sharp-tongued, fashion-forward and, by his own admission, troubled soul Blake Sutherland offers his homespun advice to those in need…

 

Q1. I am a stylist trying to make it in Sydney. What advice would you give me regarding interning? Is it better to start out on my own or try and get an internship with one of the bigger names even though it is incredibly hard and I have no real contacts. I love Rachel Zoe 🙂

I’m the absolute worst person to ask about this as I’m probably worse off than you but whatever.

Okay, so regarding interning, my best advice to you is to be on your guard and trust your instincts. The Sydney fashion pond is a very small one and only the meanest of fish survive. Don’t be nice and work hard. It’s a fish eat fish world, so prepare to be used and abused but know when to say no.

When it comes to how to start your career, the safest bet is to get an internship with a magazine or designer, but most of the time you’ll finish your contract there with nothing but a Dotti dress and some stale Adriano Zumbo Macarons. My advice to you is, as hard as it is amongst all the fakeness and shit talking, make friends. Like even if you want to stab a bitch you have to remember that that bitch knows a bitch that knows another bitch that you need to know, okay?

Also Rachel Zoe is cool but I instantly know someone won’t make it as a stylist if the only one they can name is Rachel Zoe as thin and fab as she is, soz xx

 

Q2. My boyfriend and I are constantly fighting. So I want to take him away for an amazing weekend away that he will never forget. How much money should I borrow from my dad for this and what would you suggest we do?

Firstly, Kudos to you for having a boyfriend! What’s that like? What do they eat and how often do you have to walk them?

Secondly, I’ll just stick to what I know on this subject and give you some sound advice! Dump him, take daddy’s money, come find me and well go shopping, your shout! 

I’m a relationship guru.

 

Q3. I am torn between having straight locks which are damaged by straightener overuse, or going natural and protecting my hair but being a frizz ball. What should I do?

I feel your pain my frizzy friend, I feel your pain. Fortunately in today’s modern world there are many ways to deny your heritage and conform to the norm of the stringy Caucasian locks that seem all the rage these days! You could invest in a good-quality lace front wig, sew in some tracks of the finest hair farmed in India into your scalp, buy some really big hats or join a convent and become a nun because nobody wants to bang you because you’ve given up on your hair. So while burning and cooking your natural coils into pin straight tendrils MAY be doing your hair damage, you still probably look cuter than you would if you did nothing at all to it. 

So yeah, think about that.

 

Q4. Guys are such jerks! My boyfriend said he loves me but he isn’t AS attracted to me now that I am no longer blonde! Should I keep the brunette hair or bring out the bleach bottle again for summer/love?

Your boyfriend sounds like a critical bitch, like who is he, your mum? The great and wise Pussycat Dolls once sang, ‘I don’t need a man’, and that’s a creed I live by. You don’t need a man, blonde or brunette. Fat or skinny. Third nipple or no 3rd nipple. 

Just for fun maybe suggest he gets a circumcision and then be all, ‘I found you more attractive with foreskin babes.’

 

Q5. What is the BEST way to hold my new KK handbag when I go to Westfield for subway?

Kill. Your. Self.

 

Photo by Spencer Dungey

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