TJ Cohen urges on #TeamAustralia after reading a recent sexual health study finding Aussies are having less sex BUT are engaging in a broader range of sexual activities.
Aussies are having less sex.
What’s happened, everyone?
Are we getting slack?
Are our genitals malfunctioning?
Are you doing it as you read this?
Well, are you?
No, you’re probably not. You’re probably part of that 75 percent of men who are jerking off instead. Or that 25 percent of women who are watching pornography WHILE reading this (you talented, magical thing.)
However, chances are that you’re not doing any of the above…and instead, you’re just reading this bloody article.
Shame on you! You’re letting our country down! What will America think when they hear about Australia’s decreasing ability to get laid?
Never fear, we have the gay and bisexual men to lean on. Studies found that straight women have sexual contact with an average of around eight men during their lifetimes, while straight men report having sex with 18 women. Gay and bisexual men supposedly have an average of 96 partners, while for lesbian and bisexual women, the number is six.
Our adventurous spirit will also hold our country up – 21 percent of men and 14 percent of women under 20 reported having oral sex before intercourse. That doesn’t sound like a lot, until you consider that only 3 percent of people currently in their 60s said that the same was true for them.
That’s right folks, we may not be getting laid but we’re probably having oral sex or some other glorious kinky fetish.
Go team Australia!
To celebrate being a year old, we want you, the readers, to help us decide the articles you loved best during our first year and to encourage you to participate, we are giving away three prizes!
All you have to do is look through our archives of content and email us your favourite article and also if you want, the one you weren’t so up with. From the submissions, we will assess the most-loved content from our first year and republish it at the end of our birthday month.
Both writers and readers are encouraged to enter (No, Paris, you cannot nominate your own articles…#justsaying), so please email us at firstname.lastname@example.org by 30th November to enter! Please include your name, address and mobile number.
And the prizes are…(did we mention there are prizes…?)
First prize: A brilliant acting course based in Sydney and hosted by Darlo Drama worth $550!
Second prize: A gift pack from our friends at Booktopia
Third prize: Four movie passes
(Plus watch out for a couple of other competitions during our birthday month!)