Reflecting on the continued abuse of Gabi Grecko Edelsten, we at TBS are calling for a unifying set of laws by which all gold-diggers should abide.
“All gold-diggers are equal, but some gold-diggers are more equal than others.”
With the acidic backlash toward Gabi Grecko-Edelsten continuing to burn its way through social media, seething through daytime television boxes and feuding clashes with members of her own kind, we’re wondering: why her? Why is she being targeted?
This week in the US, the Don Bradman of gold-diggers, Holly Madison, released her tell-all autobiography describing her tenure under Hef at the Playboy Mansion, Down the Rabbit Hole: Curious Adventures and a Cautionary Tale of an Ex-Playboy Bunny”. Which, in its own rights could be considered an equally tacky PR stunt, at least on par with falling down a flight of stairs to risk an unborn child. Holly, however, was supported for her move, and lauded as a true you-go-girl-genius, whilst Gabi, stair wounds and all, is being run out of town with the pointed stick of accusation.
So why the hate? She’s just participating in normative gold-digger behaviour. The same publicity stunts, the same rushed uber-wedding, the same low-cut everything, the same spaced-out vacuous lyrical bombs.
Brass tacks now, is it her, or is it us? Are we disappointed that our Geoff is a cantankerous medical nerd who holds board meetings instead of grotto flesh parties? Is it the lack of glamour? Or is it a darker fear, worrying of what the “cool kids” might think? Fearing the cold shame of them noticing our pale imitation and laughing in our faces? Are we erring on the side of safety, just hating her by default, to save ourselves?
So at TBS we’re calling for a set of unifying rules. Either give her a break, or give everyone a break. With that in mind, please support our growing legislation movement if you feel the same.
The Big Smoke Gold Standard:
- All acts of gold-diggery and subsequent attempts to remain in the limelight, no matter how desperate, shall be viewed only on merit, and nary judged against another.
- Tell-all documentation, exclusives, one hour television spots shall be taken with the equal amount of salt, already dispensed to the previous gold-digger.
- Private lives, and the supposition of, shall continue unabated, but only if rocks are thrown in both directions.
- Cat fights, and the awaiting of, shall be billed equally, providing the pluses-and-minuses of each gold-diggers’ respective attributes and arguments based on trite evidence, and never hearsay. (NB: if a cougar sound-effect would be added, be sureth that it shall ring twain.)