This TBS Ten is with Peter Berner, where we find out about the importance of fixing your teeth and how a great comic sees the world.
TBS: What do you think the key factor is in you ending up where you are today career-wise?
Peter Berner: Many years ago I publicly mocked and derided the media’s coverage of a major department store’s grand opening of the new cosmetic counter at their flagship city store. I ridiculed the event and those who attended, which included, as one would expect, many of the leading and most attractive thinkers in the land but also the then-state Premier. Streets were cordoned off for the event. Now, as I sit alone and drink myself to death, I can’t help but think that my decision, on that fatal morning, proved a turning point in my career.
TBS: Who do you consider the most intriguing public figure to watch at the moment?
Peter Berner: Elon Musk.
TBS: What is the worst way for a person to try and get your attention on social media?
Peter Berner: Spelling my name incorrectly.
TBS: If you could determine the exact influence you have on a young person, what do you hope she or he would gain from observing you?
Peter Berner: Just because you have bad teeth doesn’t mean you have to learn the banjo. There’s a lot you might be allowed to do if looks are not important to future employers.
TBS: What advice would you give a 15-year-old Peter Berner?
Peter Berner: Get your teeth fixed.
TBS: Tell us something NO-ONE knows about you…until now…
Peter Berner: A few years back I kill…wow…you almost got me. Boy, that question, just slipped in like that, would have made life much easier for the people running Guantanamo Bay.
TBS: What is your favourite pretentious word to say in unrelated situations?
Peter Berner: Dystopian.
TBS: What is the one gift you will pretty much always re-gift…
Peter Berner: A firm handshake.
TBS: What is your favourite inspirational quote or person, as cliche as it may be?
Peter Berner: “A good comic wakes up and sees the world as a funny place. A great comic doesn’t.”
TBS: In 3 words or less, how would you describe a Peter Berner comedy show?
Peter Berner: I guess the easiest way would be to not use my first name and just go with “Berner comedy show”.