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TBS Likes is a strange place where anything goes. Like International Waters, or Christmas morning after the shine has worn off and the booze has kicked in. May the ugliness commence.

While You Were Asleep: Hayne quits NFL, world’s biggest plane lands requisite complaint, Kiedis hospitalised

Approx Reading Time-10Morning, all. What happened while you were copping Z’s? Quite a lot actually, including Jarryd Hayne pulling the pin. To play for Fiji?

 

Hayne Plane schedules unexpected stopover in Suva

Ha! Thought we’d lazily get our fix on the aeronautics pun game before the “aircraft” is felled by the repetitive ack-ack of tabloid headlines. Anyhoo. Jarryd Hayne, the man who swept us all along on his impossible American dream – where he’d shortcut the assumed requirement of a childhood playing the game, to succeed in the NFL, because ‘Straya – has decided that his impossible American dream is indeed impossible, and to play for Fiji in the upcoming Rio Olympics. In Rugby. Wha?

As far as narratives go, it’s akin to Rhett leaving Scarlett at the end of Gone with the Wind, so she decides that she was born to hand jive, finds a flying car with an Italian-American fella in it, they fly off, and then the Death Star blows up.

Great shot kid, that was one-in-a-million.

 

World’s largest plane lands in Perth, locals complain about “gridlock”

Perth. Australia’s fourth greatest largest city. Home of the unusable beaches…the other thing, and making the rest of us endure morning television before the cricket has another notch in her very thin belt (see: extension cord).

The AN225, celebrated as the world’s fattest plane has rolled her way onto our shores. Don’t comment on its weight, it’s glandular. The world’s largest plane is all well and good, and the dusty corpse of Howard Hughes must be turning over in his grave (and even amount of times, mind) to see such a colossus fly, but what of the reaction from the public? Those stunned West Coastians, who can grip history with their leathery, sun beaten hands?

Well, there was comment. Mainly on the traffic though.

First thought: ten cars? You call that traffic?

Either, or; a momentous day for the future of traffic. I can’t wait for a handful of cars to be reclassified as a “jam.” Enlightened times are these.

The way of the future.

The way of the future.

The way of the future.

 

Anthony Kiedis hospitalised, band mates get flippant

Red Hot Chili Peppers front-man (who owns no shirts), Anthony Kiedis, has been hospitalised overnight for an undisclosed medical condition, forcing the band to cancel their scheduled gig in Los Angeles.

The news was trumpeted by fellow Pepper and drag race enthusiast, Flea, who reached maximum flippancy levels telling the crowd that they were cancelling due to Kiedis’ “medical thing”. Unsure what the problem is exactly, but here’s a soul who might know:

Have a grand day, y’all!

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