Yesterday, the news circled around two pieces of little consequence, while the actual news went unheralded. We avoided the recession, and that should be the issue. To the Libmobile!
After I shut down the humming banks of computers in the LibLab last night, I murmured my way to bed irate, my elitist sense of Leftist injustice tingling. You see, yesterday, a strange new tune was composed, before it played itself out with a tedious familiarity. Yesterday, there was irrefutable evidence that the Coalition did good. As the clock struck twelve, a hunched figure crept out of the shadows of Leftist derision to deliver the positive notes. ScoMo gleefully revealed that this was not a recession we would have to endure, and that the Commonwealth had decided to thumb its sunburnt noses at the threatening expert assumption of financial disaster, as the GDP exceeded all expectations and is now sleeping calmly at a positive +1.1%.
Soon thereafter, the spotlight was wrenched from a positive headline to a searing wave of negativity, however.
The finance depart got its staff to star in this video for its grad program and it’s so bad I can’t stop watching it https://t.co/fPvRypz4gr
— Alice Workman (@workmanalice) February 28, 2017
— CPSU (@CPSUnion) February 28, 2017
Yes, I grant you, public servants serving the Commonwealth at a McCafe, or via the dankest recruitment video known to man, has the heaviest chance of precipitating monsoonal lols, and I chortled in angry jest. But in the grander scheme of things, what’s more important: a handful of employees who are enduring a temp office pickle, or the momentary safeguarding of something that wounds us all, the motherfudging economy? I’m willing to bet my collection of business-casual capes that if this quarter followed the last, and the estimations of the bean counters, and appeared red instead of black, it’d be a yet another rope slung over the yardarm, as the crowd raised voices and rotten vegetables to banish the ‘orrible beast ‘rooked Malcolm.
But it matters not, I guess. Negativity has moved discussion ever since a Neanderthal discovered criticism 40,000 years ago and decided to carve into the side of his cavemate’s back to inform everyone else about it. But, in the midst of the penalty rate cut, Monday’s newspoll and the general vibe of the poorest being levelled by the speeding, pegasus-drawn, ivory cart of Turnbull engineered uber-Capitalism, the point seems to have fallen upon the deaf ears of the comment-box-Beethovens of the Internet Philharmonic.
While politics here and abroad has decided to rezone the middle ground in favour of stockpiling heavier ordinance of chemical criticism, the positives must be acknowledged alongside the failures. For if the US has taught us anything, waiting for your turn to speak, combined with vituperative criticism, looses the beast under the boards so he can trot his bent tapdance as we have no choice but to politely clap along. The take home question is simple: do you want us to turn this car around and give you Peter Dutton? Huh? Do you want that?
Exactly. Keep it down back there. We’re trying to drive the economy.