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While you were asleep: UN over Syria, disappointment over Perth and Turnbull’s make-up phone-call

Approx Reading Time-10We all look as bad as we feel. So, what happened while you were asleep? UN discussions over Syria, disappointment in Perth and Malcolm was forced to make up with Trump.

 

 

 

Syrian gas attack update, world prods both parties to the negotiation table.

Well, the plot thickens, and then twists over upon itself. Russia, one of the original suspects of the attack, has pointed blame at the Syrian Air Force for bombing a factory that was processing chemical weapons.

Whereas the narrative is somewhat different from elsewhere:

However, it seems that some good has come of it. Whether someone dropped chemical weapons, or bombed a factory that was producing them, the outright international castigation may be the silver lining on the saran gas cloud, as leaders of much (Pope Francis) and much less repute (Boris Johnson) have condemned the acts, with the UN meeting today to see what will be done in response.

Fingers crossed it means more than another 56 hour ceasefire.

 

Perth feels the need, the need for…abject disappointment.

Well, isn’t this a stifling, hot mess of gooey disappointment, and not just for the people of Perth, but also stereotypical assumption. To celebrate a half-century of service, Singapore Airlines decided to treat the locals with a spectacular low flyover of the Capital. Sort of:

This is similarly disappointing for everyone who religiously watched Top Gun growing up and therefore thought that flying dangerously low was a uniform desire across all airmen – even if you were flying a cargo plane full of rubber dog shit out of Hong Kong.

Boo, Singapore Airlines, boo you.

 

Turnbull urged to patch things up with Trump, nation takes phone away from Malcolm.

Poor Malcolm. Not only does he have to communicate with a backward Senate strumming a banjo à la Deliverance, now he’s being poked with a stick to set a date with the inventor of Twitter, POTUS Donald J Trump, “as soon as possible”. The apparent concerns is that the PM’s perceived inaction on the political foreplay front will see our longtime beau/controlling fuckboy of a partner move to pastures anew.

At the risk of editorialising. Don’t, Mal.

It’s hard to blame him. After all, last time round he made it onto Saturday Night Live for fucksake. No political figure or indeed artist worth his salt should have to endure such brutality. Moreover, the sound of good government emanating from the White House right now sounds like a strobe light fucking a drum machine in a tornado.

Probably best to not call them back, Mal. Sure, call China. They seem nice. Even if they treat us good just to get back at our ex, so what, we’re being treated good. Go on…

Also, side note. What the fuck, 1973.

 

The top five Tweets from overnight:

 

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