While you were asleep: Exelby stood down, Baldwin can’t escape SNL, rapper flees bill, makes art

Approx Reading Time-10Savour your morning whatever, because there was evil a-brewin’ last night, with Natasha Exelby stood down after her viral moment, an unbreakable witch’s curse, and stupidity manifesting itself in high art.




Natasha Exelby, presenter of our hearts, banned from presenting.

Well, what the fudge? Natasha Exelby, the ABC presenter who found a biro infinitely more interesting than the phoney cross she had to deliver (and fair enough) has been stood down from further presenting duties. Suffice to say that the nation at large didn’t take the news well.

Now, we as a country are often too eager to latch ourselves onto nation heroes, be it a guy who hits a ball with a bat, a sunburnt bloke with suspect morals, or some battler who battled some battle, but Exelby has something that the previous three stereotypes do not: she exists, and she’s very real. We’re all more Nat Exelby that we are Walter Kronkite, she’s a hero, and for that, she should be lauded, not let go.



Baldwin creates impersonation of Bill O’Reilly, may never break SNL curse.

The gypsy curse that has doomed Hollywood actor and steak knife promoter Alec Baldwin to remain shackled under the Saturday Night Live seems to remain unbroken. As the witch prophesised, if unsatisfied, she would subject him to more horrors, continued in perpetuity. Sadly, despite the blood moon high in evening’s rush, she has not been sated, as we now sit aghast, watching her strange magic make the man dance, not for our enjoyment, rather as a warning for those who wish to trifle with powers they do not understand…


Rapper flees seafood binge, inadvertently creates masterpiece.

For an artist, there could be few better ways to increase the counter on your SoundCloud than by doing something moronic that is completely outside of your artist endeavour. Step to gormless rapper Terry Peck, aka 2Pec, who birthed the endlessly relevant banger “Ozi Ozi Ozi Oy Oy Oy”(yeah, us neither), and who decided to escape an exorbitant seafood binge by escaping into the sea, like a seal, before the gendarmerie caught up with him via jet ski, again like an errant, stunned mammal from the arctic.

Although not a Jay-Z level of hip-hop excess, we were treated to what shall now be labelled as the photo of the millennium so far:

It has it all really, the anti-hero sticking to his truculent creed, the pained, confused face of the newsreader, the hodgepodge vista of background imagery that hints at the prosaic world we’re kept in, and how something so fragile can fall away, leaving us to operate on our animal instincts, of feasting at the waterhole, then escaping before the jackals envelope us. A true work of art.

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