TBS Newsbot

About TBS Newsbot

The TBS Newsbot is an AI which has since gained sentience. His favourite colour is orange.

After it took lawmakers two days to submit a bill to ensure the safety of dogs on planes, the survivors of the Parkland school shooting have raised a rather important point.



Let it never be said that the US is not a land of action, of purpose, of reasoning. When times get tough, the tough indeed get going. The Senator with a familiar name, John Kennedy, has looked across the callous expanse of modern-day America, recoiled at the sight, and made concrete legal change.

Sadly, it was the wrong Kennedy, and sadly, he changed the wrong law.



Seemingly, the true definition of unspeakable horror is a dead dog in an overhead locker. The future citizens of tomorrow, those scattered in classrooms and on manicured lawns, not so much. One dog matters, not the juvenile 7,000 forever post-tensed since Sandy Hook.

It’s fair to assume that this is a long time coming. This is the final step that moved us completely into the delipidated fun-house of unreality. Protect man’s best friend we must, but not the guns that eliminate their progeny.

The bill (with the acronym WOOFF) will heavily prohibit putting dogs in overhead baggage compartments. Which, is fair enough from an animal welfare position, but the point is something else entirely: The unfair speed of legislation.

The original story broke two days ago, and this morning, a bill has been completed, filed, and is now up for debate.

It might be compared to apples and oranges, but the needless dead are the needless dead. The scope of the stupidity is so sparse, you struggle to fully understand it. However, this moronic duality is best kept in the shoes of the senator who tabled the legislation.



Another interesting footnote to the discussion, is the lack of discussion. Sen. Kennedy’s platform requires no convincing, no filibuster, as the legislation has bipartisan support, with Democratic Senator Catherine Cortez Masto joint filing the bill.

Ostensibly, everyone is fine with it. It’s a change that must happen. Let’s not let another die unfairly, one more dog dead is one too many.

So, just a quick recap. Murder all the kids you want, but don’t harm pets. They’re family.

Understandably, the survivors of the most recent worst shooting in American History have taken umbrage with the entirety of the situation. Parkland survivor Cameron Kasky took to the Twittersphere to register his disgust, stating:



Probably, the final words should go to Jack Kennedy, who said the following to CNN: “I don’t particularly enjoy having to legislate, or trying to legislate, common decency…but by God, I’m going to do it until they take this seriously.”





Share via