Bill Shorten to undergo Labor Conversion Therapy

In a desperate attempt to bring him to life, Labor is set to push Bill Shorten to undergo a radical procedure. Could work.



In a desperate attempt to reverse a spate of bipartisan policy announcements, senior Labor Ministers have intervened and ordered leader, Bill Shorten, to undergo a controversial Labor Conversion Therapy.

The brainchild of Labor Party legend Paul Keating and administered by Labor’s greatest asset, former Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull, the treatment involves the subject having to endure several Liberal Party fundraising dinners and a replay of a Barnaby Joyce 60 Minutes interview.

“Thankfully we’ve never had to activate the Joyce interview,” said Keating in an exclusive interview with The Big Smoke, “but this is could be an exceptional case.”

It’s understood that Shorten agreed to the treatment after being told his good friend, Scott Morrison, would also join him.


Share via