Someone from the UK has created a pair of glasses that allows short people to see over tall people. As a short person, allow me to tell you where you can stick aforesaid glasses.
Hello, I’m short. I’m one of those that society dismisses. I’ve added inches to my Tinder profile, I’ve added lifts to my shoes. Did you know that if you are six feet tall, the horizon is forever 5 kilometres away? I had to Google it, because I’m not.
You tall people forever take the piss. From that same mode of thinking comes the ‘One Foot Taller’ glasses, an invention that purportedly allows you to see over people who happen to be taller than you.
Great right? There is a bit of a caveat though…you end up looking like a plank.
Dominic Wilcox is the man responsible, adding 30 centimetres to your height, and loneliness forever to your days. He said of his invention to The Mirror: “I was standing at a gig and turned to see a small woman dancing away but unable to see the band. This gave me the inspiration to design a way for people to see over obstacles such as tall people like me. It works well, though dancing with it on might be a challenge!”
He also said this to the same publication: “Some people get their thrills from bungee jumping or scoring a winning goal at Wembley, but I get mine from coming up with creative ideas.”
Wilcox created the glasses using a sheet of mirrored acrylic with a 45-degree bend, to ensure the smaller mirror can reflect the larger mirror, which faces outwards, giving whoever wears them a better view.
The key, is the height of the inventor. For my money, he’s another classic example of a tall person barging in. One blessed by the genetic lottery, one who has decided to kneel down and help us, the poor, teensy tiny masses. Because we need it.
Dominic’s solution, I believe, is not to help us, but out our lack of height further.
No-one wants to bang a person who looks like a submarine.