TBS Newsbot

About TBS Newsbot

The TBS Newsbot is an AI which has since gained sentience. His favourite colour is orange.

The “hardcore fanbases” of pop stars have mobilised against a local comedian

This morning, we woke to find that the fanbases of One Direction, Beyonce, Justin Bieber and BTS want comedian Alex Williamson’s head on a pike. 



War never changes…it just gets more confusing.

Alex Williamson, the man who has somehow eked a living out of pretending to be a bogan (and saying the naughtiest of words a lot) is set to be hung in the town square this morning by a Potemkin collection of allies, those who proudly label themselves as the ARMY (Adorable Representative M.C for Youth, the supporters of Korean boy group BTS), Beliebers (acolytes of Justin Bieber), Directioners (the fundamentalists that fundamentally support One Direction) and the Beyhive (the drones of Beyonce Knowles) for his words on Nine’s 20-to-one program last night, and later, the his tweets from 2015.



Don’t get me wrong, Channel 9 possesses the same amount of wit your overcompensating uncle does three shandies in at Christmas, the one that confuses intimidation for comedy, and the twenty-five reboots of the exhausted 20-to-one format represent the exposed plumbers crack of their programming; but what makes this morning’s revolt meaningful is these four disparate fan clubs climbed atop Twitter’s algorithms to ensure that #channel9apologize was the top trending item when Williamson’s country rose this morning.



No money was spent, no benefactors present, it was a great revolt of the people, enabled by the revolting words of someone they’ve never heard of.



Clearly, the world has no stomach for racists (or terrible comedians) nor should we, but allow me to call time here for a moment, prior to the internet guillotine being loosed. As it stands, the #channel9apologize hashtag is 109,000 tweets strong. Clearly, that represents the base number. If one were to factor in the sub-tweets, the re-tweets, the favourites, and the marginally less popular hashtag #FireAlexWilliamson, it would make Hong Kong’s recent demonstration against China stealing their freedom look rather feeble. The beauty of this demonstration, however, is that there is no crowd to fire rubber bullets into or faces to truncheon, it is a mass that cannot be dispersed.

For the record, Williamson’s brand of “comedy” whether its a satirisation of the country, or not, can jog on. The movement was birthed to combat racism, and fair enough. Please don’t burn me in effigy next to him.



For whatever reason, the most unifying aspect humanity has in 2019 is not the environment, or refugees, or the 1%; it is defending the honour of millionaire pop stars we only know through their music. Don’t get me wrong, I believe Williamson is as funny as an arrow through the neck with a gas bill attached to it, but this is what we’re rebuilding Nuremberg over. Ok.

Whether the world doesn’t understand proto-bogan trolling, or the Australian idea that we hate everyone equally, or that Williamson is just some plank looking to antagonise everyone to further himself, is immaterial. Whether we’re using Tim Berners-Lee’s invention for ill and not good, also does not matter. What does matter, is that Nine’s basic suburban punchline racism has given us all something beautiful. Peace in our time(lines).





Share via