Emboldened by tragedy, Australia’s premier industrialist has vowed to restore the Big Brother house to “her former glory”.



Provoked by the senseless fire that destroyed Australia’s oldest cultural centre, the Big Brother house on the Gold Coast, noted Queensland businessman Clive Palmer has offered to singlehandedly rebuild it, labelling the abandoned television studio “our Notre Dame”.



“This is a place of our national history,” he noted. “Hotdogs, Merlin, staying up late for the chance of seeing boob, we must rebuild it”.

When pressed whether he could realistically compare the Big Brother House fire to the Notre Dame blaze, Clive agreed, stating that “…you just couldn’t. All the Notre Dame had was that hunchback and that Jesus nonsense…our cathedral gave us Pete & Christina’s Dancing Doona. Enough said.”




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