According to the musings of one Bloomberg journalist, the humble avocado is now as valuable as Bitcoin. Hass moves everything around me!



It’s been a weird couple of years for investments. It seems our hopes and dreams either hinge on buying a tiny percentage of a currency substitute we cannot see, touch, or understand; or wilfully crushing it by our reckless brunchtime mastication of a legume.

However, as one nonsense turn invariably deserves another, as Tracy Alloway from Bloomberg believes that we’re witnessing the greatest millennial cross-over yet seen, as she believes that “Bitcoin remains fairly valued according to my avocado-based pricing model, even after rising past $11,000”, which may be tongue firmly in cheek, but if avocado is currently in yours, you’re literally eating your nest egg. This is not just the musings of a solitary journalist, mind, as the puzzling rise has also been noted elsewhere.


The green line depicts the average price of Hass avocado, the white represents the cost of Bitcoin. The right axis depicts the cost per 10-kilogram box of Hass avocado. Source: Alloway / Bloomberg


Clearly, this affords us some knowledge of our modern options, evidencing the puzzling rise of avocado toast. Clearly, what’s required is a flooding of the market with cheaper avocados. It will drive the value up, sure, and ruin everything, yes. But if we learned the salient lesson from cryptocurrency, if the Hass avocado is Bitcoin, then what’s required are a whole raft of lesser imitations. It won’t last forever, but we’ll be able to take advantage of this avocado spike, and get rich before the bottom falls out.



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