For reasons unknown, Netflix has decided to meddle with what made them great in the first place: binge-watching.
Being someone who has been thrust into the streaming generation, we cling to one stoic, singular creed. We shall binge…by any means necessary. Yes, the seas are rising, the economy is tanking and we’re all going to die early, but all of that is dwarfed by the news that Netflix has decided to deforest the seedlings of our procrastination.
Seemingly, the end of times is held in a baking contest. Lo, The Great British Bake Off is debuting on Netflix, but it will be restricted to a solitary episode a week. It’s odd, as Netflix clearly popularised binge-watching, look here’s a pair of branded socks that halts the episode when it detects when the wearer has nodded off.
However, there’s a school of thought that it may be a positive mood, as like Pretzels bought whilst food shopping, we’ll eat the entire bag in the car and later hate ourselves for it.
Quartz has this take: “…one of the reasons that a mild-mannered baking contest has been such a runaway hit has to do with scarcity—there’s nothing else on television that consistently provides the warm, fuzzy good vibes that the show and it’s ever-pleasant contestants do. With only 10 or so new episodes a year (give or take a holiday special or two), you have to dole them out to yourself carefully to prolong the enjoyment.”
In the minds of Netflix, they’re saving us from ourselves. We always want one more, and the drag is certainly real. But, honestly, don’t tell me how to overindulge on your service Netflix, you don’t ever get to do that.
As a noted man of impulse William S. Burroughs once wrote, “whether you sniff it smoke it eat it or shove it up your ass the result is the same: addiction.”
Give me my cakes. All at once. I gave you my money, your part in this transaction is over. Gimme gimme.