You’ve been drinking again, haven’t you, the week that’s just past. I can smell it on you. You’ve been with that Piers Morgan again, haven’t you? You sicken me.
It’s Monday. Hoorah. While you were dredging your subconscious, France settled on Emmanuel Macron, the A-League was finalised, and the Internet ganged up on Piers Morgan. Pretty standard.
Monday, why. What happened while you were asleep? Well, Kanye changed his hair colour, Jim Jefferies started a new social trend in #FlipOffASympathiser and the responses to Trump’s executive orders were tabulated.
Good morning, class. What happened while you were asleep? Well, Assange packed his bags, Ewan McGregor chose life (over Piers Morgan) and Trump “didn’t” call for an investigation into the process that made him President (good call).